Catch up

So between apple and WordPress, the app I use to update my blog hasn’t been working. It turns out that really throws me off my blogging habit.   And I had a blood test this week that resulted in an interesting (concerning?) message.

For the last two years or so my GP’s has sent me reminders to have my iron checked.  I have ignored them ( they always seem to arrive after a miscarriage or particularly brutal period).  So I finally caved and went in to get the blood test request form.  The doctor I saw said he would call with results and I didn’t need to come in.  But then he rang me and left a message- I have anaemia and it would be a good idea to come in.  Oh yay.  Haven’t done that yet.

I have been tired all week, so I do now have an explanation.

Life at home.  Teenagers are known for their black and white view of the world.  And a desire to rebel.  Yes, ticking those boxes. I would like to think I wasn’t this much of a PITA, but it is entirely possible.  

 

Microblog Monday- not what was expected!

It feels like that sentence is defining my week so far.  We had a nice Saturday, going out to dinner for G’s birthday.  Sunday was not bad either, but the family dinner at my mum’s was definitely not what was expected.

There was a loud argument (is it an argument when only one person is yelling?) between one of my step-brothers and my mum and stepfather.  Just after I have had a week or two contemplating the relative non-confrontational manner of my family.

Today i took my limping iPhone to the Apple store to see if they could help.  yes they could- i was on track for a battery replacement until they discovered third party mods.  I got that phone new out of the box from work.  not happy.

And then i go to blog on my ipad and the app will not open!

A deep breath, just keep going even when it isn’t going to plan.

Struggles

So depression.  Like I said in the earlier post, it is quite situational.  It is five years since the first pregnancy.  And that is proving to be much harder than I thought. If I had even thought about it.  I think because if someone had told me at that time that there would still be no children five years later, I would not have believed.  It’s not an easy thought.

So I think I have reached the point at which I cannot keep actively trying.  It’s hard there too.  And that is causing a lot of sadness.

I know my coworker is trying.  I suspect she may already be pregnant.  She’s six months younger than me.  And that too will be very hard, because it just isn’t fair.  And life isn’t fair, but it doesn’t make it easier when it isn’t.  

So struggling there.  And the plan B- the one where we ceased to be responsible adults and went off travelling. That one has been spiked, as a result of having J move in.  And that comes with a dose of frustration.  

My life feels largely out of my control.  The paths I want to take are not available, but not through my choices.

kyoto day four

We did something a bit different on this day.  By this point a lot of shops were shut for the new year holiday. As we had not gone to Mt Koya when we were in Osaka, I thought we could go up a different mountain. I wanted to take G to Kurama, a little tiny village that holds a bizarre fire festival in October. I have been to the fire festival twice, but never had much of a chance to see the village.  The train there goes from a small station not connected to any other line.

To get there we ended up taking a subway to the same stop as the imperial palace and then walking several blocks and across the river to get to the little station.  The walk was nice, a chance to see a more everyday side of kyoto.  Then we came to the bridge over the river. It’s actually the point where two rivers merge.  And we could cross on the bridge, or use giant stepping stones.  Of course we chose the stones! Some were shaped like turtles

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River with stepping stones

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Train

The train was small, only two carriages, and it would through the outer suburbs of Kyoto before starting to climb. Not a long ride, maybe 30 minutes.

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Kurama was the last stop.  We got out and wandered down the street- it is basically one street on the side of the mountain, houses on either side.  We were looking for the cable car.  We didn’t find it, but we found ice!  Then we went back to the shrine near the station, climbed the stairs and found a tiny cable car- what I would call a funicular.  Tiny, only one seat each side of the aisle. We took that up e side of the mountain, not very far. That part of the mountain is part of a temple complex, so there are buildings and paths, but also trees and calm.  I liked being in the middle of the pine forest.  It is very soothing for me (not so much for G).  We didn’t follow the trail to the next valley, but walked down towards the village.

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Then we took the train back down the mountain.  Near the end station there was a bus that took us close to Ginkakuji- the silver temple.  Unlike the gold temple, it isn’t actually silver.  it has a beautiful garden though

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Philosophers path

Once we had finished at the temple we wandered down the philosophers path.  This is a walkway along a little canal that runs between Ginkakuji and several other temples.  In the spring it is lined with cherry blossom, in the fall with colourful leaves.  We were on it on a chilly winter twilight.  There are a of little shops and cafes along the path, catering to tourists.  Not all of them were open, due to both the late time and the fact that the new year holidays were somewhat in effect. We did find a shop that lets you cast your own pottery piece!

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We didn’t do the pottery thing- we bought a couple of premade cups though.

We kept going through the chilly evening.  There are a lot of cats in this area.  But my photos are not so great in the light. At the end of the path we headed back towards the bus route, and we found a coffee shop we went to back in 2010.  This was the shop that introduced us to siphon coffee.  So we stopped in and had a cup.  It seems to be a bit of a taxi driver hangout in the evening.

Then we caught the bus back and ended up at a lovely Italian restaurant in the station.

Brief notes

It’s starting to get chilly.  Not by much, but enough that we don’t need fans in the evening.

First gym class in a month.  My core muscles don’t seem to exist anymore.  But I do feel calmer.

A little more on the stitching, it’s a slow process.

I had my annualish work performance discussion. All good.  I may get to change my title.  I probably won’t get to be research manager, but if anyone has any suggestions?  I am the research department, plus do compliance stuff.  

I need to be careful on my reading material.  I reread a book last night where the emotional justice is not balanced (the bad things one character does are not redeemed).  It made me quite upset.  The entertainment we consume does have an effect.

Stitch swap. It’s an event, usually facilitated by Internet, where several people agree to participate, usually around a theme.  Each person is assigned a person to make something for.  Sometimes swaps are balanced, two people make each other something.  Sometimes they are not balanced, I make something for one person and a third person makes something for me.  This is the first time I have participated in a stitch swap, and I am a bit worried I will struggle with the timeframe.

 

Microblog Monday – bits and pieces

Oh look, a post for microblog Monday.  And posts two days in a row!  

I have been taking an unplanned break from writing and reading blogs.  As always, there are blogs that have fallen away when I return.  It’s sad, not knowing why.  But I am noticing fewer blogs out there. Or maybe I am looking in the wrong places?

My period started today. Which is a boo for the whole TTC thing, but also seems to be a return to 30 day cycles instead of 34 or so. Which is good.

I have just signed up for a stitch swap.  First time, what was I thinking?

Still working through Terry Pratchett’s books.  I had forgotten how on target some of his observations can be.

 

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