Category: A bad backup is better than none

My office looks out onto a small city park, a busy road and an Anglican cathedral.  We are on the second floor (third to some- we have ground, first floor and then second floor), so close to the ground.  My little office enjoys observing life outside. We see a lot of weddings and a lot of tow trucks.

A few of the weddings are big traditional affairs, with lots of guests. They aren’t the interesting ones.  The cathedral is popular with overseas couples who use a wedding service.  Getting married overseas, using traditional western wedding trappings was very popular in Japan when I lived there.  It’s cheaper than the big Japanese wedding for many.  The customers of this wedding company are all Asian, so we are guessing that is what is happening. This sort of service is very popular in Queensland, as it is already a good travel destination from east Asia. We can recognise the company- it’s always the same planner, the same limo driver (and limo), the same sequence. They come over to the park to take pictures and drink bubbles.  We get to look at the dresses, the groom’s suit (is it white? Is it grey? Is it shiny), the family (sometimes there are friends and family) and the general behaviour of the groom. The wedding party has to jaywalk across a four-lane road- some grooms are more solicitous of their wife than others, sometimes the couples hold hands but not often.  It’s always a happy moment when we get to observe a wedding!

So, I have not been posting.

No really good reason, just life is busy and I am stressed. I write the posts in my head, they just never make it further.  

Tomorrow is my 40th birthday.  It isn’t an easy one.  I remember back when I turned 25, a co-worker (who was in her 30’s) stated that she had a mental breakdown at that age.  This was the day before my 25th birthday.  She had struggled with her expectations of what her life would be like at that age and the reality.   That was not an issue for my 25th or 30th.  But apparently it is this time.  I have been struggling with this for a few months,off and on. Hopefully it gets easier after the big day.

I don’t have huge celebrations planned- a lunch tomorrow with some co-workers (and my boss told me that I didn’t need to rush back afterwards- which would be great, but I have stuff to doooo) then dinner out with my husband (venue yet to be determined).  A big family dinner on Saturday- my siblings are coming to town for that. 

I am going try to write more, but we shall see.

Hmm, maybe I should try and post once in the month.  I don’t like this month and it doesn’t like me.

Things I did:

Went for a second opinion on the whole infertility thing. Plus side- nothing else obvious we should/could do.  Bad- same thing, there is no magic bullet

We went to Melbourne and saw Bruce Springsteen

I thought some embroidery

I did some watercolour- the watercolour class was late January and then we had a watercolour night with QCWA in February 

I saw a large spider in a car park

This most recent weekend we went to the beach

I also had a busy work month, there is an industry wide change that came into force this year. The deadline for reporting the information was today, and a lot of decisions had to be made this month.  It is a complex change and I have spent too much time explaining it.

Not sure I am looking forward to march- I have a big birthday coming up.

So I went to a weekend art class about painting watercolours.  It was interesting.  I was definitely outclassed. A couple of the other students were school art teachers, so had art skills.  My drawing skills are not great.  It was fun to play around with paint and colour and practice. But it was challenging.

I was uncomfortable at points because I did struggle with the process.  I wasn’t confident in my skills, so it was not always obvious what to do. The pieces of work that the teacher liked were not necessarily the ones I liked.  Sometimes it is important to try to do things that are outside my comfort zone.  Making art-painting, drawing, sculpting all require you to look at the world around you.  Sometimes it is just about looking at the small details, sometimes it is about looking at the bigger picture. 

I have also been making phone calls that make me uncomfortable, trying to get appointments.

Because I was at the class all weekend I did not march, although there was a march in my town.  My feed has been full of the marches though- I wish I had been able to participate.

I started writing this last Wednesday (nov 2) buts taken me a while…

I got a call from the obstetrician who we were seeing today.  There were no abnormalities with my d&c and the chromosomal analysis  was normal.  Just like all the others. Although this time the doctor did say that this didn’t mean there was a genetic abnormality, but that it wasn’t a a gross chromosomal level. So short of highly intensive genetic analysis (which may not be an available thing) we will continue to have no idea.

I don’t know where to go from here. We have seen the fertility specialist and we do have an IVF plan, for when we want.  We could go down the path of sperm donor as well.  We could stick with our own stuff but do emetic analysis. We could do nothing.

I don’t know.  

I don’t know if I can say I am depressed, but I am not functioning at a normal level either.

after that election, I am somewhat grateful I don’t have a child.  I am genuinely scared that we are headed for a global conflict, or at the very least problems that are going to get worse…

Some thoughts.  In 2010 I worked as an election official in a federal election in Australia, where we narrowly re-elected our first female prime minister.  It Some thoughts.  In 2010 I worked as an election official in a federal election in Australia, where we narrowly re-elected our first female prime minister.  It was so narrow that the result, in the end, was decided by the few independent MPs.  What I noticed that day was that at the end of the day when we counted the ballots by hand, was that the conservative parties had election observers present but the left did not.  At least one of the observers was the adult son of another observer.  The conservative party was better at indoctrinating their message. Lefty, social justice parties are not so good.

In part this is for very good reasons- we believe that everybody has the right to an opinion and a voice, and we tolerate others’, even as we disagree (or at least this is my view on this element).  Conservative parties are much less tolerant of others opinions, they are like the bossy person in a meeting who will not let others disagree.  They win because they are so focused on making sure that their opinion dominates.  In order to preserve liberal democracy, this tendency has to be overcome.

Progressive politics racked up an amazing number of wins in the USA (and worldwide) in the early 20th century.  These were achieved largely by women, despite the fact that they often did not have the vote (that was one of the wins). How can we do that again?

Those of us who live comfortable lives often forget how hard-won those are, and how fragile they are for others.  If you are upset with this election, don’t bunker down in your safe suburb, or in your group of like-minded friends.  Go out and be the action you want.  Make noise. so narrow that the result, in the end, was decided by the few independent MPs.  What I noticed that day was that at the end of the day when we counted the ballots by hand, was that the conservative parties had election observers present but the left did not.  At least one of the observers was the adult son of another observer.  The conservative party was better at indoctrinating their message. Lefty, social justice parties are not so good.

In part this is for very good reasons- we believe that everybody has the right to an opinion and a voice, and we tolerate others’, even as we disagree (or at least this is my view on this element).  Conservative parties are much less tolerant of others opinions, they are like the bossy person in a meeting who will not let others disagree.  They win because they are so focused on making sure that their opinion dominates.  In order to preserve liberal democracy, this tendency has to be overcome.

Progressive politics racked up an amazing number of wins in the USA (and worldwide) in the early 20^th century.  These were achieved largely by women, despite the fact that they often did not have the vote (that was one of the wins). How can we do that again?

Those of us who live comfortable lives often forget how hard-won those are, and how fragile they are for others.  If you are upset with this election, don’t bunker down in your safe suburb, or in your group of like-minded friends.  Go out and be the action you want.  Make noise.

This US election cycle has been depressing. One of the more depressing things is the constant refrain from one side that they are sick of “political correctness”.  That’s some upset privilege talking. Political correctness needs to be rephrased as what it is- modern good manners.

Oh, member of a group (an identifiable group) you would prefer we don’t use a pejorative name for that group! That’s reasonable and good manners. 

Oh, we would like active consent before engaging in sex and sex-related activities! That is simply good manners.  

Both genders should receive equal opportunities and there shouldn’t be any bias.  I don’t what to call it but good manners.

So now when I hear people say that they don’t believe in political correctness and they want to be un-PC, I am going to mentally replace that with manners and rudeness. ” I don’t believe in political correctness ” becomes I don’t believe in good manners” and I am un-PC” becomes ” I am rude”.  It doesn’t sound so good then does it, but that is what they mean! 

Oh, it has been a while.  I have spent the last few months being quite distracted.  I know I have posted during that time, but distracted none the less.  And I have been looking for things to distract me from a reasonably unhappy state. And there have been many.

We played Pokemon Go

So many people at night in South Brisbane! And so many Pokemon (not pictured)

I drank decadent hot chocolate

Yum!

And we went to an exhibition of clothes from the Miss Fisher murder mysteries tv show.  I like the books and the show.  On the day we went they were having a garden party event as well

We walked along the river

We also went to the Ekka- the royal national exhibition, which is essentially the state fair.

For the first time they used the old Queensland museum, which was an original exhibition building

We also went to Greazefest and looked at old cars

We went to Melbourne to see a degas exhibition 

We enjoyed coffee and cake, wine and o thee food

We made an epic mountain cake

We went to Comic Con- no pictures because it wasn’t great!

I went to a Cindy Sherman exhibition

We watched fireworks

This weekend I went to a craft show and volunteered at Fort Lytton for one day of Brisbane open house

So a lot of busy time. I need a vacation!

I made a Black Forest trifle for a 70s themed lunch.  I decided on that after perusing various 70s recipes and realising that I don’t like  a lot of food from that era, and don’t know how to make a lot of it.  But a trifle based on a cake popular then- can do.  There are a lot of recipes on the Internet, but not a lot of consistency. 

 So I made it up.  I bought a lot of the elements pre made, because it was easier, but they could be made.

I started with a chocolate Swiss roll, from the supermarket.  I think a chocolate sponge would also work, but there were no plain sponges at the supermarket.  One recipe I saw suggested brownies.  The cake was cur into slices, and covered with some cherry jam.

I then put some bottled morello cherries, some of the syrup from the cherries and some cherry liquor in a saucepan with a little bit of sugar and boiled it, to try and make a thicker cherry section. It didn’t thicken, but it boiled away a lot of the alcohol.  Next time I might try kirsch (we used heering cherry liquor).

I then put the cherries on top of the cake

For the custard I wanted chocolate custard, but didn’t want to make it from scratch. So we bought ready made custard, the nice local farm brand!  I put that on the stove on a low heat, and while it was heating I melted some dark chocolate (a large bar so probably 180-200 grams) and then whisked it into the custard. It was a little bitter, but the rest of the trifle was so sweet, it worked and by the next day didn’t taste as bitter.

I then chopped up some milk chocolate and scattered it on the custard with some more cherries. If you do this, warn people before they eat that there are chocolate chunks in there, otherwise they think it is a cherry stone.

I put it in the fridge overnight. In the morning I whipped some cream and covered it with grated milk chocolate.

It was delicious- this may be a go to Christmas dessert now.  Very chocolatey.  

A mixed bag of things.

• I was really sick last Thursday and Friday.  My boss told me to go home on Thursday.   I don’t get sick that often, so it was hard.  I cancelled our Saturday activities, but then woke up feeling good on Saturday.
• The fun run on Sunday? Was really good.  The course was completely changed this year, and as a result, was a lot more fun and easier for me to complete. So it was pretty good, despite the lack of preparation and the illness.
• The cake did not get eaten. “Couldn’t be bothered”. So it went in the rubbish.   
• Work is going through some changes, the larger company needs to tighten its belt. While this is good in some ways, it is stressful, and some of the more entitled managers/areas are having issues.
• I am going to try to make a Black Forest trifle for a thing on Saturday. So basically a trifle made with Black Forest cake components. Going to be interesting.
• Parliament reconvenes tomorrow. This means that my work will get more interesting. 

Not that much interesting happening, this is probably a good thing.